YES, we are deemed able to care for and provide for D.
I don't usually update my blog from work but I just found out from Bill that the I-171H came in the mail today. What a sigh of relief... or more like, scream of joy.
Now we just have to hope that Mr. Kyrygzstan judge has recovered from his illness and shows up to work this week.
Thursday, March 6, 2008
Sunday, March 2, 2008
Perhaps No News Is Good News
We are are still waiting for our I-171H to come through. Our homestudy agency was advised that they had everything they needed from us. I looked on the CIS website to see what months they are processing and it looks like our CIS office is now getting caught up to their normal timeframe so we think it will be any day now.
So the one ridiculous thing I have to write here so I can look back and laugh one day is that the email I sent almost 2 months ago to the CIS was answered. It was a generic answer stating that our application is being processed in the timeframes expected and that their Service policy is to work on applications in the order they were received. Convenient. I wonder why they feel like they have to stick to that policy, but not the other one regarding responding to emails within 36 hours, which is after all, what their auto reply states. Oh, I forgot, their autoreply also states that they process I-600's within 60 - 90 days. Go figure.
As for the Kyrgyzstan side of things, our dossier has been there for about 3 weeks. Our coordinator went to court a couple of Fridays ago only to find that the judge was out sick. Aaaghhh! So, she was supposed to try again this past Friday.
As Americans, I know for a fact that we feel that it is important for us to know what is going on at every step of the process. I understand that other cultures aren't necessarily on board with that. We are used to getting information, whether it be straightforward or not, and getting it fast. And I know that other families who have BTDT know better than me. They know that this is part of the international adoption process, part of the rollercoaster ride. But I just can't help but wonder, 1) why there was not anyone else to cover for this judge on the day he was out sick, and 2) why it would take a whole week to try and go to court again. As someone wrote to me, for all we know, they could be going at lightning speed compared to the way it was when it was still the USSR. Am I just a pushy, impatient, self-centered American?
As of yesterday, Karen hasn't heard a word so we are hoping that no news is good news. Hopefully this means all went fine. We are keeping our fingers, toes, eyes, hairs, legs, and arms crossed. But honestly, anyone who has ever tried it can tell you, it's hard to keep that up for an extended period of time, especially crossing your eyes.
So the one ridiculous thing I have to write here so I can look back and laugh one day is that the email I sent almost 2 months ago to the CIS was answered. It was a generic answer stating that our application is being processed in the timeframes expected and that their Service policy is to work on applications in the order they were received. Convenient. I wonder why they feel like they have to stick to that policy, but not the other one regarding responding to emails within 36 hours, which is after all, what their auto reply states. Oh, I forgot, their autoreply also states that they process I-600's within 60 - 90 days. Go figure.
As for the Kyrgyzstan side of things, our dossier has been there for about 3 weeks. Our coordinator went to court a couple of Fridays ago only to find that the judge was out sick. Aaaghhh! So, she was supposed to try again this past Friday.
As Americans, I know for a fact that we feel that it is important for us to know what is going on at every step of the process. I understand that other cultures aren't necessarily on board with that. We are used to getting information, whether it be straightforward or not, and getting it fast. And I know that other families who have BTDT know better than me. They know that this is part of the international adoption process, part of the rollercoaster ride. But I just can't help but wonder, 1) why there was not anyone else to cover for this judge on the day he was out sick, and 2) why it would take a whole week to try and go to court again. As someone wrote to me, for all we know, they could be going at lightning speed compared to the way it was when it was still the USSR. Am I just a pushy, impatient, self-centered American?
As of yesterday, Karen hasn't heard a word so we are hoping that no news is good news. Hopefully this means all went fine. We are keeping our fingers, toes, eyes, hairs, legs, and arms crossed. But honestly, anyone who has ever tried it can tell you, it's hard to keep that up for an extended period of time, especially crossing your eyes.
History of the Hot Rocker
To answer some questions and give a little more relevance to why we also love this rocker, yes, it is custom upholstered. My Aunt Linda is an interior designer and had some leftover fabric from a large project. It's actually an outdoor fabric so no need to scotchguard it for spills and other messy stuff. It's pretty soft though so you would never guess that it is a fabric that was made to withstand the elements, including one little boy who we are certain will do his best to leave his mark. As for the rocker itself, that came from Uncle Bob, Aunt Linda's fiance. He has 2 really awesome girls and they are now 9 and 11. This was their rocker when they were babies. The rocker was sitting in their garage with the old fabric on it. Obviously it has not been used in years. When the girls learned about D, and their dad offered this rocker to us, the girls were so excited to give their old rocker to him. So, long story short, the rocker got reupholstered with this rockin' fabric and what is old Americana style furniture got a new more updated and "funky" (as Jamie phrased it) look.
Thursday, February 28, 2008
The Rocker that Rocks!
How is this for a mommy rocker? Right on!! Groovy! Cool! Hot! In other words, it rocks!
What a wonderful gift from Titsky, Uncle Bob, Lily and Vicky!
Sunday, February 17, 2008
Serendipity and a Little Perspective
According to Dictionary.com, the word "serendipity" is defined as an aptitude for making desirable discoveries by accident. We are indebted to the English author Horace Walpole for the word serendipity, which he coined in one of the 3,000 or more letters on which his literary reputation primarily rests. In a letter of January 28, 1754, Walpole says that "this discovery, indeed, is almost of that kind which I call Serendipity, a very expressive word." Walpole formed the word on an old name for Sri Lanka, Serendip. He explained that this name was part of the title of "a silly fairy tale, called The Three Princes of Serendip: as their highnesses traveled, they were always making discoveries, by accidents and sagacity, of things which they were not in quest of...."
It is still pretty hard to accept the news about each delay when they are communicated to us. But to put things in perspective, I guess we are very fortunate that D is doing well, that the CIS now has everything they need from us, and that Saule is going to court next Friday.
Sure, I was hoping court was a month ago but things happen for a reason, right? I am not a particularly religious person in the Judeo Christian sense, but I do believe in the universal law of serendipity and karma and I have to believe that everything will work out for the best. We are good people, with good intentions. We try our best to be considerate and fair and kind to others. I think all of that energy goes somewhere that goes full circle. I may not see how or what will happen in the future, but I do believe it will work out.
In thinking back on our journey to D, he wasn't even in our realm of consciousness a year ago. We were still thick in the midst of our attempts at conception. We have been pretty tunnel-visioned about the whole idea of starting a biological family for so long. We hadn't even seriously considered adoption until the first IVF cycle failed. And I don't know how the idea of adoption was able to creep into the picture but it did. We really only tried a second IVF cycle to see if results would be better. At some point, we kicked around the idea that we would try and do an adoption even if we did get pregnant. All of that seemed so long ago but it actually isn't. All of the heartache we endured was just leading us closer to D. And now, none of that other stuff matters, only that we have discovered how much we want D in our lives.
Now, as zen as that sounds, I never said I wasn't going to have freak outs in between. I am, after all, a bit of a control freak and I don't always trust things I cannot see. It is getting a little easier to accept that certain things are out of my control but it is a work in progress. After all, as much as I want to say all of this have been deliberate, serendipity has been taking care of us pretty well.
I just have to remember to keep things in perspective. A year from now, none of the pain of this waiting will be important because we will have the joy of having D with us. And I am certain there will have been other serendipitous moments we can think back upon and enjoy.
It is still pretty hard to accept the news about each delay when they are communicated to us. But to put things in perspective, I guess we are very fortunate that D is doing well, that the CIS now has everything they need from us, and that Saule is going to court next Friday.
Sure, I was hoping court was a month ago but things happen for a reason, right? I am not a particularly religious person in the Judeo Christian sense, but I do believe in the universal law of serendipity and karma and I have to believe that everything will work out for the best. We are good people, with good intentions. We try our best to be considerate and fair and kind to others. I think all of that energy goes somewhere that goes full circle. I may not see how or what will happen in the future, but I do believe it will work out.
In thinking back on our journey to D, he wasn't even in our realm of consciousness a year ago. We were still thick in the midst of our attempts at conception. We have been pretty tunnel-visioned about the whole idea of starting a biological family for so long. We hadn't even seriously considered adoption until the first IVF cycle failed. And I don't know how the idea of adoption was able to creep into the picture but it did. We really only tried a second IVF cycle to see if results would be better. At some point, we kicked around the idea that we would try and do an adoption even if we did get pregnant. All of that seemed so long ago but it actually isn't. All of the heartache we endured was just leading us closer to D. And now, none of that other stuff matters, only that we have discovered how much we want D in our lives.
Now, as zen as that sounds, I never said I wasn't going to have freak outs in between. I am, after all, a bit of a control freak and I don't always trust things I cannot see. It is getting a little easier to accept that certain things are out of my control but it is a work in progress. After all, as much as I want to say all of this have been deliberate, serendipity has been taking care of us pretty well.
I just have to remember to keep things in perspective. A year from now, none of the pain of this waiting will be important because we will have the joy of having D with us. And I am certain there will have been other serendipitous moments we can think back upon and enjoy.
Friday, February 8, 2008
4 Years and Counting
We've been waiting over 4 years for D. I know it sounds crazy but we have. Through all the fertility treatments and superstitious advise followed in our attempts at conception, we are now here at the home stretch. And I'm trying so hard to stay positive while my baby is half a world away oblivious to the life he could have with us.
He feels so distant right now. I am terrified that we will not get him home. I am terrified that all the rumors are going to be true about more delays imminent at the Kyrgyzstan courts. I am terrified that the CIS will end up wanting more documents that will be impossible to obtain.
The little clothes we got in the meantime no longer fit. The diapers we were so sure were going to be big enough have become too small. His little snowsuit hanging in the closet that was bought for his trip home hangs there useless.
I want to fall asleep for a month an wake up ready to get on a plane to my precious son. Then, all will be right again.
He feels so distant right now. I am terrified that we will not get him home. I am terrified that all the rumors are going to be true about more delays imminent at the Kyrgyzstan courts. I am terrified that the CIS will end up wanting more documents that will be impossible to obtain.
The little clothes we got in the meantime no longer fit. The diapers we were so sure were going to be big enough have become too small. His little snowsuit hanging in the closet that was bought for his trip home hangs there useless.
I want to fall asleep for a month an wake up ready to get on a plane to my precious son. Then, all will be right again.
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Gratitude Where It is Due
I could go on bitching about the treatment we received at the CIS office yesterday but thought that it would be better to report that our boy is now 15 pounds. He grew 4 pounds in the last 5 weeks. According to our IA doctor's office "It's not a leap to say he has great growth. This weight measurement is 50th percentile for US children, which is lovely for a child in an orphanage!" When we met him, he was only in the 25th percentile. I'm so proud of D and miss him so much. I was in tears when I read this from the wonderful internet friend who is in Bishkek to meet her baby girl. The hole in my heart tore just a little bigger but at the same time, I was so happy to hear how well he is doing.
I really do want to also take the time to articulate and memorialize my feelings of gratefulness for so many things. I am grateful that he is doing well despite being in an orphanage. I'm so grateful for the caregivers who continue to keep him safe and healthy in our absense. I am grateful for the awesome people in my family who at moment's notice took care of paperwork tht we needed for our CIS application. And lastly, I am so grateful for the Yahoo group through which I have met so many wonderful people who have been so supportive with words of encouragement and warmth, and willingness to take some time from their visit with their babies to take photos, get an update and play with D.
I really do want to also take the time to articulate and memorialize my feelings of gratefulness for so many things. I am grateful that he is doing well despite being in an orphanage. I'm so grateful for the caregivers who continue to keep him safe and healthy in our absense. I am grateful for the awesome people in my family who at moment's notice took care of paperwork tht we needed for our CIS application. And lastly, I am so grateful for the Yahoo group through which I have met so many wonderful people who have been so supportive with words of encouragement and warmth, and willingness to take some time from their visit with their babies to take photos, get an update and play with D.
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